Good news/Bad news

Good news: I am about ready to send my revised YA manuscript off to my editor. It feels like all I've done for the past month is work on this book. I hope I can share more about this project soon - I don't even have a title yet.

Bad news: I still worry it's not good enough. I've never been this worried about a book before, and I'm not sure what that means exactly.

Good news: I had a fabulous time on a writing retreat this past weekend in Midway, Utah. It is so beautiful there, and these ladies are so fun to hang out with. From left to right, top to bottom, Irene Latham, Rachel Hawkins, Emily Wing Smith, Mr. Moose, Lindsey Leavitt and me.

Bad news: It was like the calm before the storm. Last night the dog hurt her leg running down the stairs and I have to take her in for an x-ray today. Freshman son wants to go out for track and I just learned he has to get a physical before he can start practice next Monday. I have to have some dental work done tomorrow. And I swore I'd get started on taxes this week. I hope our bank account can survive all the madness. And me too, of course.

Good news: Some exciting news is in the works. 

Bad news: I can't say anything about it yet.

I've missed you all! Hope everyone is doing well. 

It's not just Valentine's Day around my house

Twenty two years ago, I married my best friend on a snowy winter night. Yes, I was a hopeless romantic young thing who believed what better day to say "I love you forever" than on THE day of love.

What can I say.

I'm in love with love!! If you've read my books, that will come as no surprise to you.

I'm also still in love with my husband, twenty two years later. Lucky me!

Thoughts on picky readers

I get notes every week that start out along these lines:

I usually hate to read, but I just read.... and then she goes on to tell me how she read one of my books in one day and she loved it or whatever.

Now, I am thrilled that you read my book and enjoyed it. YAY! But I'm sad to see that you think you hate reading. Because I don't think you really do. I think you are maybe just very particular with your tastes and lots of books aren't your cup of tea.

So guess what. You have to work a little bit harder to find books you'll like. But that's the great thing about books for kids and teens today. There are SO MANY to choose from! I know it can be discouraging to have friends who can easily walk into a library, pick a book off the shelf because the cover looks cool, and be happy with it when they start reading. Oh well. You aren't like that. You might have to ask your librarian or a teacher or your parent for help in finding books that you might enjoy.

I have one child who is a very selective eater, due to sensory integration disorder. He doesn't hate eating. He just doesn't like a lot of textures found in foods, and so, he's very selective about what he eats. I think it can be the same for some kids and reading. It's not the reading itself that they hate, because when they find a book that "fits them" they'll happily read it and ask for more.

Yesterday a mother of a 4th grader wrote to me, so happy that her daughter read IT'S RAINING CUPCAKES, because she said she has always hated to read. She ordered SPRINKLES AND SECRETS for her, because her daughter couldn't stop talking about the first book, and she wanted to keep the momentum going.

I told her, now you know your daughter likes realistic, girly reads, so you can help her find books "like that," and I went on to give her some suggestions.

Are you a picky reader or do you know anyone who is? I'd love to hear from you, and do you think I'm right, that it's not so much about hating to read as it is about finding books that are a good fit?

Author Fair, Thursday, Feb. 2nd, Camas WA

I'll be participating in an author fair, put on by librarians in Camas, WA, on Thursday, February 2nd. The event is open to the public from 7 to 8 p.m. Feel free to bring books for me to sign! Books will be available to purchase at the fair as well.

Find out more by going here: http://www.ci.camas.wa.us/library/images/newsletter/2012authorfairpublic.pdf

Dear John Green

Watching you and your brother on stage yesterday in Portland, as the "grown-up" that I am, was such a wonderful experience. Young adults gathered in a place where it's okay if you read. It's okay if you like quirky songs about protons and anglerfish. And it's okay that you feel different sometimes. 

In fact, you and your brother show them, day after day, not only is it okay, it's actually awesome.

A few years back, there came a point where you and your brother realized people were watching you. Lots of people. And you had choices as to which direction you went. Some may think that choice was easy, but I'm guessing it probably wasn't as easy as they might think.

As I looked out at the crowd, people clutching your book and singing Hank's songs, happy to be among like-minded people, I felt amazingly proud of all have you done. Yes, you write great books, books I love and have loved since way back when I picked up LOOKING FOR ALASKA before it had that shiny sticker on it. But see, that's the thing. A lot of people write great books.

It's what you've done beyond that -- proving to the world that people can do amazing things when they put their hearts and minds in the right place -- that makes my heart feel all squishy when I think of you. And why I teared up at the end of your performance. I know, I'm a big sap, I can't help it! 

You chose wisely, John. And today, I just wanted to say, thank you for choosing the path that isn't always easy for you, isn't always easy for your family, and puts you out there more than any introverted author would ever be comfortable with. You chose the path that would help make the world a better place. The path that would help kids across the WORLD see themselves, and others, in a different light. I know you don't feel like you can take much credit for everything that's happened, and it's absolutely a community effort, but it began with a choice. Yours and Hank's. 

Like you said today, we choose what we think about every second of every day. And we choose where those thoughts take us. Thank you for being such a good human and leading by example.

With love from my squishy heart,

Lisa Schroeder

Lists are nice, but...

Yesterday YALSA announced some of their annual lists, including Best Fiction for Young Adults (BFYA), Quick Picks for Reluctant Readers, and Popular Paperbacks.

THE DAY BEFORE was nominated for the BFYA and Quick Picks, and CHASING BROOKLYN for the Popular Paperbacks list (a huge thank you to the people who nominated them).

In the end, one panned out - THE DAY BEFORE made the 2012 Quick Pick List for Reluctant Readers. I love that there is a list like this to help librarians when teens come to them and say, I have to read a book for xyz, but I hate reading. I think this happens more than we might think. And I'm really honored and appreciative that THE DAY BEFORE made the list. My book, I HEART YOU, YOU HAUNT ME, made the same list in 2009. And it's true, my books are great for reluctant readers. I know because I get notes all the time that say, "I usually hate to read but I love your books."

But honestly, I always sort of dread the day the lists are announced. Because while there are many happy people, I also know there are just as many disappointed people. People who have written wonderful books, and get no recognition on any of the lists.

Making one of those lists, especially the BFYA list, feels good. Well, I can only assume it does, because I've never made that list. It means a committee of librarians, after getting teen feedback, felt your book deserved to be named "one of the best of the year." It's a huge honor!

So, somehow, when you don't make the list, you have to come to terms with the fact that yours is not one of "the best."

Except, I'm here to tell you, it is.

Your book may not be one of the best to that group of librarians. But somewhere, I'm pretty sure, there is a kid who loves YOUR book more than any other book. And that's what you, and I, have to hold in our hearts.

Occasionally I find myself wishing I could write like Sara Zarr or John Green or Nina LaCour or Lindsey Leavitt or Stephanie Perkins or Sarah Ockler or... (I could go on forever). But as I've talked about before, that will never happen. I am who I am. I write what I write. And lists or no lists, stars or no stars, riches or no riches, my books do have a place on the shelves.

AND SO DO YOURS.

It is hard to feel "less than." I know, because I feel it sometimes as a writer. And I hate that. This isn't high school. I shouldn't feel like I don't fit in because I don't have the best jeans and the cutest shoes. My YA novels are different, and sometimes different is ground breaking and transcending, and sometimes it's just... different. And like I tell kids all the time at school visits, it's okay to be different! But different isn't always popular, and that's what's hard.

Anyway... I guess I just wanted to send out a note to anyone who might be feeling a little down about not making one of the lists yesterday. Or any of the "Best of" lists that come out at the end of every year.

As Sara Zarr once said, one of my favorite quotes of all time: "A book is a wonderful, miraculous thing. But in some sense, it's also just a book."

It's all about perspective, really.

Last year, when CHASING BROOKLYN didn't make any of the lists, I remember it didn't phase me at all. I was so consumed with worry, and praying and hoping for my friend, Lisa Madigan, who had recently been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and was fighting for her life. There's some perspective, right there. I remember reading tweets and blog posts about the lists and all I could think was, who cares? My friend is dying.

No BFYA for me. Oh well. Life goes on, and because it does, I get to write more books, and that's really the thing worth celebrating, right there, I believe!

Authors and Reviews

True story:

My very first full-time job after college was working for this woman who yelled a lot. She would be in her office, sitting at her desk, and instead of coming to get me, she would yell.

"Lisa, what is wrong with this? Please come in here, I don't understand it."

"Lisa, did you do that PAF I asked you to do? I can't find it."

"Lisa, where is that posting listed? Is it in the spot it's supposed to be in?"

And so it would go.

And the way she asked the questions made me feel like I was on the defensive *all* the time.

In case you've never worked for someone like that, let me tell you, it isn't very fun.

Now, some people probably have no problem with this style. They simply accept that's how she is, and it doesn't bother them.

Remember, this was my first "real" job. I was a 22-year-old college graduate, and I hadn't been around long enough to not take it personally.

It felt personal.

The more time that went by, the more it got to me. I didn't like being yelled at all the time. Even when I walked into her office, she'd fire questions at me. "Did you... " Why did you..." "How come..." And her voice was harsh as she asked. I constantly felt like a child who had done something wrong and needed to figure out how to get myself out of trouble.

I finally called the Employee Assistance Program and made an appointment with a counselor to try and get some help with how to deal with it. You can guess what happened. "You have to tell her how you feel."

Are you kidding me?

"You have to tell her how you feel. There's no way anything will change unless you two talk it out."

I'm pretty sure it was one of the scariest moments of my life, walking into that lady's office, asking if I could talk to her for a few minutes, shutting the door, and telling her how her yelling made me feel.

Do you know what she told me? She had no idea she'd been doing that. She had no idea I felt like she didn't like my work all the time. She had no idea she made me feel that way.

I can't say things got better, really. I think maybe she tried, for a little while, but she was the way she was and I was the way I was - more sensitive than most, probably

And so it is with authors. Some authors are more sensitive than others. Some authors are able to let things roll off their backs while others take it all in and it becomes a part of them. And so, here is where problems can happen between reviewers and authors.

I think everyone can agree - reviews are not for authors. But I don't know that it's realistic to simply tell authors, stay away from reviews, because everyone is different. Some really want to read them and to learn from them.

What's important, I think, is for you to know yourself. And then, come up with a policy that is going to make sense for you. In developing that policy, you need to ask yourself questions. Are you sensitive? Is it going to do more harm than good for you to read reviews? What are you looking for when you go looking for reviews? Be HONEST with yourself.

I think many of us, deep down, whether we want to admit it or not, are sensitive creatures who long for love and approval. Maybe we didn't get enough of it growing up. Maybe we didn't get it when we were 22 years old and worked our first job. Maybe we don't get it now from our life partners the way we wish we would.

But whatever it is that we're missing? Here's what we need to understand - we're not going to find it in reviews. All the wonderful, glowing praise about a book I wrote will feel good for a minute. Maybe even five minutes. But it eventually goes away. Because that's not really what I'm looking for. Is it? No. It's not.

And responding to reviews, getting worked up about them, trying to change them? None of that is going to help. It really isn't. Those reviewers aren't like a boss, who I have to work with day in and day out. Those reviewers have nothing to do with me and my life. And no matter how upset I get in regards to a review, it is NOT appropriate to talk it out the way I tried to talk things out with that boss.

I think sometimes we get confused and think, well, if this were someone I had to work with, I'd say something. So maybe I should say something. Do we not remember what we've already agreed on? Okay, so we forget from time to time. But let's all try to remember - reviews are not for authors.

I worked that job for a year and a half, and I finally had enough and decided it was time to move on. That lady and I were not a very good match. I needed different things from a boss than she could give me.

It's not always easy figuring out what we need. What's missing. Or if we do figure it out, how to get it. I have a hole in my life right now because of some things outside of my control. I'm trying to figure out how to fill that hole. How to find the joy I'm longing for in that particular area of my life.

But I want to assure you, readers and reviewers - I know you are not the answer. I appreciate you reading my books, I appreciate your kind notes to me, and I appreciate that because of you, I'm still doing a job that fulfills me in a way other things don't.

Appreciation is one thing. Expecting you to satisfy my soul and to fill me up with peace and love is quite another. And I promise I'm not going to put that on you.